the beginning.

I finished packing. I went out for one last hurrah. I said my goodbyes. I left North Carolina. I survived staging in Miami. It all came and went. And then...

2/10/10

Coming down on Paraguay, I was mesmerized by its beauty. Vibrant green. So green. Contrasted with the red dirt roads and red roofs... It was beautiful. With each step of this journey, everything has become more real and I found myself looking down on these hundreds of homes and lives thinking ¨where´s mine?¨Luckily I had more time to think about this seeing as our pilot overshot the landing... typical.

Driving towards the training center in Guarambare, looking out the window, I had flashbacks of other images I´ve had traveling. This induced a nostalgia turned excitement for this Latino world. A part of me just comes alive here...

2/11/10

After a short session at the training center came the moment we had all been waiting for: the assignment of our host families for training. I opened my envelope to find the names of my family typed: my host mom and dad, my 24 year old brother, my 20 year old sister, and my 12 year old sister. Then, written in pencil, I see: Alanis, 15 dias. I live with a precious 26 day old (as of today) baby girl.

Like Alanis, I am open-eyed, trying to take it all in. I am trying to figure out how to do things and trying to explore this new world I have entered. I don´t always know how to ask for what I want and sometimes I might get what I don´t need. People come by all day to look at me; some try to talk to me in a language that sounds like baby talk. I try to adjust to this heat and this life, and maybe sometimes I might cry and just want to be held. But, like Alanis, I know I will be ok because there are people who care about me. And I know now that I am a part of something much bigger than what I knew before. Living with my family has been wonderful; I enjoy sharing meals, drinking terere, and sweltering in the heat with them. Most of all, I am thankful that someone else is new here too.

2/12/10

It is so hot. So hot. I cannot begin to express how hot it is. It´s just so hot and humid that you can´t do anything. You can´t think, you can´t move, you can hardly talk. You just float into lethargic oblivion...

Today we were in a neighboring town listening to a presentation by the Peace Corps Country Director when I smelled it. Out of nowhere. And it took over the room: the musk of sweet rain. Faces lit up around the room. We could hardly listen anymore. Yet the presentation carried on. And about an hour later, we were released, and when we burst from the classrom, we realized: no lluvia. No rain. So where did that taunting smell come from??

A bit disheartened, we all headed towards our separate homes, and I went across the ruta for a game of volibol with my cousins. In the middle of the game, I saw it. Hazy blue streaks extending down in the east. It was coming.

We kept playing voli until finally - drip, drip, drop. I felt it. It got harder and harder, heavier and heavier. My sister and I ran across the street home, and I stopped and let it hit me. Finally, I felt clean; I felt cool. And in that moment, I found myself in the most beautiful view: the middle of the highway, sun setting in the west, rain in the east.

I will miss...

...my sweet Shadow,

delicious Blue Cups,

the beautiful snow,

all things Carolina,

seeing the Avetts in concert,

but most of all, my most perfect friends and family. My heart is already aching in our separation.

love to all of you.
next time - from paraguayyy!

Inspiration